late night thoughts

is it a sign that he is too old if you call him at 9:30 and he is already half asleep and wants to call back tomorrow?

date night with dad is the BEST! observatory and Eurocafe. saturn. saturn's rings. jupiter.

those songs from High School Musical ARE pretty catchy

will i have enough energy to one day be a mother?

now i am a chiropractic patient trying to not crack my own

peak hours are still between 10 and 2 a.m.

what's the thread count of my sheets and what do I really want and want am I willing to pay for?

soft sheets

goat cheese

x-rays

plucking eyebrows

hosting book club

I am hosting June's lock and key book club and we will be reading (I just KNEW that the book would come to me!) No one belongs here more than you. Stories by Miranda July.

http://noonebelongsheremorethanyou.com/

click the above to get a quick sense of miranda july. i am so excited!
Her last film You and Me and Everyone We Know is one of my top 5 movies of all time.
Plus, the cute boy at the bookstore knew exactly where the book was, which made me happy. You know, to know that someone else knows.

Running out of gas, take 64!

pop-rox says that we're too old to be screaming and ranting and raving. "We're not THAT old," I text back. He returns with, "Well I am :)"

then, just 2 hours later, on my way to work, I run out of gas on a zooming speeding freeway. in a rental car. and since I was in the zooming speeding lane myself, I needed somehow to get to the opposite side of the freeway. but in a rental car and under zooming speeding pressure while your car has slowed to about 5 mph because you have RUN out of GAS, and while honking horns fill your ears and you try to cry in the rearview mirror so that the hopefully nice lady in the minivan behind you will take pitty....semi's swooshing past. hmm. maybe if I straddle BOTH lane with my stalling car, people will realize that even though it's only a blinker and NOT the emergency lights, that just maybe I am in trouble of some sort and would give me a break (yes, I did realize later that I have been on the other side, frustrated in a car behind someone who has no CLUE). I do make it to a spot right between the on ramp/off ramp. I call pop-rox to see if he knows where the emergency lights would be, crying again. his was the first and only number I thought to call. oh yeah, I had actually left early for work for once too, although I was foolishly trying to make it to the dealership to pick up my car and drop off the rental in probably much too little time. "GET OFF THE PHONE!!" booms a voice behind me. a police man. shoot. I try to cry to him to. I hang up the phone. the next 15 minutes were spent waiting for a truck with gas to help me out. The car was in such a dangerous place that we had to "walk away from the car." :) gas comes, I feel embarassed, hair blown this way and that from freeway traffic and gawkers galore. I make it to work 12 minutes late. And everything is okay.

random observations

highway walkers. grasshoppers. bulbs on bushes. why the general scent of the house doesn't change already in my room. trouble waking.

sleeping around

aye. yaye. i was doing, well, relatively well with sleeping in my very own bed in the room i rent even in clothes made for sleeping. and now it has been a few days of back to the old habit of sleeping on parents' couch, on the floor, and in my old bed. it's not that i need to feel close to the womb. i need to use the computer. finish my late homework. look for chocolate in the cupboards. not drive around all over town.

neil, my therapist, asked me on Sunday, "has anyone told you that over the last 6 months you've gotten more beautiful?" new haircut? no, it's not your hair but you. oh, my face does feel a little more filled out. maybe i got fatter. yeah, maybe you're taking better care of yourself. me (defensively)-i take good care of myself, anyway, i haven't gained any weight. i don't know what it is. Neil-gees, it's hard for you to take a compliment. Me-well, yeah, my face does feel less drawn......What the heck? Did I gain weight? I have been sleeping more. Hmm. I don't mind if I'm supposed to gain weight and I know why, but not just out of the blue like that. Anyway, I didn't gain weight. I'm just going to take an overdue look at my diet and excercise, sleep and wonders, and do what my body and spirit tell me to do.

At night, my toes point south

Student teaching has ended. I've slept in my new home/bed 3 nights in a row now. It's healthy after paying rent for 4 months to finally be using the rented room and more importantly, to finally be with my roomates! Is there anyone else who has ever had the same problem (of not living where they are supposed to live, months to years at a time?)? I've never met anyone but I'm sure there is someone out there who might admit to it. Anyway, I now have some snacks there (honey sesame almonds, dried tart cherries, unsweetened mangos, and nerds), along with a toothbrush, toothpaste, and my bedding. And horse and monkey friends.