sleeping around

aye. yaye. i was doing, well, relatively well with sleeping in my very own bed in the room i rent even in clothes made for sleeping. and now it has been a few days of back to the old habit of sleeping on parents' couch, on the floor, and in my old bed. it's not that i need to feel close to the womb. i need to use the computer. finish my late homework. look for chocolate in the cupboards. not drive around all over town.

neil, my therapist, asked me on Sunday, "has anyone told you that over the last 6 months you've gotten more beautiful?" new haircut? no, it's not your hair but you. oh, my face does feel a little more filled out. maybe i got fatter. yeah, maybe you're taking better care of yourself. me (defensively)-i take good care of myself, anyway, i haven't gained any weight. i don't know what it is. Neil-gees, it's hard for you to take a compliment. Me-well, yeah, my face does feel less drawn......What the heck? Did I gain weight? I have been sleeping more. Hmm. I don't mind if I'm supposed to gain weight and I know why, but not just out of the blue like that. Anyway, I didn't gain weight. I'm just going to take an overdue look at my diet and excercise, sleep and wonders, and do what my body and spirit tell me to do.